21 Days

There is a saying that we need 21 days to change/form a habit.

There are some habits that I want to change and some other that I want to pick up.

21 days.

The first thing on my list,

quality time with God. 

No matter how close, I must not take the Holy Spirit for granted.

This is the holy list.

1. Quality time with God

2. Exercise

3. Healthy eating

4. Reading and journaling

5. Practicing my guitar, keyboard and vocals!

6. Being Punctual

Seriously, i think if I can do all 6, God will be grinning from ear to ear, and I prolly will not be complaining so much. 

Alrights! 21 DAYS, exciting 21!

My dear fair weather friend

My dear fair weather friend,
you invited me on an expedition with you.
An exciting journey you promised, where we discover new things.
Marvelous things that enchants our heart.

You went ahead, I follow behind.
I was unsure, you seem certain.
I mimic every move that you make,
even those expression you had when you tripped and fall.

It was fun till night falls.
The sunsets and we soon got lost.
Well you got lost.
I lost you and we went out of touch.

Not a word, not a sound,
you simply disappeared.
That taught me fear and brought me tears.
You see I was alone in the darkness.

I must be a fool to search for you.
I tried calling out for you,
over and over till I sound like a fool.
My efforts prove to be in vain and I start to feel the pain.

I thought we were in this together till you abandon me.
I must have been very foolish yet I still choose to believe,
that you had loved me.
You just loved yourself more.

Alternate worlds

Alternate worlds is a concept, whereby when we choose to walk a certain path at a crossroad, we speculate the possibilities of what happens if we choose the other path; what goes on in the other world.

In the past, I used to practise this alot, almost to a point of obsession. But I come to realise speculations do not provide any substantial results, taken to an extreme it might even strain current situations, simply because of wild imaginations.

I made a mistake when I was 17, followed by a whole series of bad decisions, I reaped the consequences now that I am 21. The fact remains that when I decide to screw up my JC education, the screw up was not just for 2years, but it change the course of my education path. Along the way I also made many many bad decisions, that really had me thinking should I have taken another path, make a different decision, will things be better? The if onlys and what ifs partners my regrets as I mulled over the circumstances, trying to justify.

But I have come to a resolve, that even as I have failed, many times. I am not a failure. Well, not yet.
Instead of speculating on alternate worlds, I should work with whatever I have in my current world. Live with this path that I have chosen to take and strive to make better decisions next time.

My bottom line is bad decisions don’t cause failures. Bad attitude does.
I want to maintain a humble heart to admit and learn from my mistakes so as not to continue that same wrong over and over.
I will not allow speculations to affect my objectivity towards situations.

Haunting

*Thanks shirls for recommending me this video and song.
This is one of the most haunting dance I ever watched, absolutely poignant. The song is great too.
Enjoy

What’s your addiction?

His Artist

He create artistes to gift the world with beauty.
Let our craft be simple and easy.
That even the simplest of heart can breathe it in.
Even the worst of mind will be touch by it.

Let not this gift be tainted to mislead.
Judge our heart motives
Weigh those fame and glory.
Careful that our craft don’t amounts to nothing.

No artist is great without the ovation from the audience.
Your performance may be great,
but you have no one to celebrate.
Artist are not made merely for fame.

Out of the overflow of the heart
is the beauty imprinted.
By the master creator,
his artist to bring healing.

I want to be God’s artist,
Love is my paintbrush,
unconditional is my paint,
his people is the canvas of my artwork.

Blog worthy

I thought I had a blog worthy conversation today.

Today. had a wonderful time with my sheepies, karchian and sharon after CLM.

Realize we spent almost the whole of the second part of Saturday together. Walking from centrepoint to cathay searching for a vacant table in starbucks and finally found one. hahaha!

 Admist the many random conversations we had today, I found this rather amusing. So readers, pls laugh!

Sharon was feeding me some popcorn chicken like things coz my hands are full and this is how our conversation goes…

Sharon: Hey, how can you eat other piece of chicken when you already have one in your mouth!

Me (matter of factly, with pieces of chicken in my mouth) : My mouth haven full yet what…

Seriously, the worse kind of persecution I can ever get is hunger!

I love Food, perhaps that’s why I name my mac muffin, my keyboard waffles and my guitar brownies.

Food makes me happy happy!

Ending my post with this ridiculous post I read from Times

“I was just trying to eat lunch.”

Zachary Christie, a 6 year old cub scout from Newark,Del.,who was given a 45-day suspension for violating a zero-tolerance weapons ban by brining to school a camping utensil equipped with a spoon, fork and knife. After a slew of protests, the suspension was rescinded on Oct,14

Man, I seriously FEEL for him.

Fighting autism.

While busy-ness is a possible reason for lack of updates lately, a more likely reason would be that I have been feeling rather autistic lately. Irony that I am a communication student majoring in Public relations and marketing yet battling this feeling of autism within. I don’t think it’s fun to be in my own world the whole time, coz how can I connect with others right?  How to communicate without connection right?

Ayes…

This is perhaps also a period that I learn new things about myself, God and the things around me. Information overload. Need time to digest…

Keep me in prayers ya

Long distance relationship

I would liken our relationship with God as a long distance relationship.

The distance is measure in sin.

The more sin, the further we are.

Long distance relationships are hard to maintain, communication are often at the  mercy of the location’s connectivity.

Everyone longs to love and to be loved. The soul hungers for satisfaction. Temptations and distractions is all around to seduce the soul.

When we have a long distance relationship with God, and allow the distractions and temptations to get in the way. We look to ” “quick fix” in our life to feed our soul.

How sad?

My response to this vulnerability within me?

Sums up in this verse from Brooke Fraser’s Faithful…

“When I can’t feel you, I have learned to reach out just the same
When I can’t hear you, I know you still hear every word I pray
And i want you more than i want to live another day
And as I wait for you maybe I’m made more faithful” – brooke fraser.

 

I think vulnerability is a lousy reason for adultery.

I don’t want to treat God like a Santa Claus or Genie, only going to him when I need help.

I want to romance God, to understand his heart, to think about him all the time and talk to him all the time. To miss him when I feel that he is far. To bug him every now and then. I don’t want it to be a long distance, I want us to be close. 

Strip away all those ministry roles and responsibilities, I am simply a lover of God. 

Shush those monday blues

 

For those who are feeling blue-ish

My take of BGR

My take on Boy Girl Relationship is beautifully depicted in Brooke Fraser’s love is waiting

I can’t pick a favourite part, because the whole song is so well written.

But if I have to, the one line I full on agree is, “I’ll give it time, give it space and be still for a spell
When it’s time to walk that way we wana walk it well.”

I am a pretty careless person, but there are some things that I know I cannot be careless with. One of which is my heart and relationships, because my heart is the vessel that God speaks into and the means that connects me with God, should it be wrecked by careless handling and hurt my relationship with God. Then I have lost my purpose of meaningful relationships, coz I have already lost the most meaningful relationship that I can ever have. 

Another part of the song that I like is, “ I can’t force the sun to rise or hasten summer’s start,
neither should I rush my way into your heart”

I think as girls, we should not manipulate our way into the hearts of another. Manipulation makes ugly everything. Manipulation in relationships is by far one of the worst.

Waiting time is beautiful, coz it allows for anticipation and preparation, so that when the real deal comes along our heart is poise and ready to embrace the romance. I will not embark on a steady relationship until I know and I know that my heart is right before God and I have the blessings of those that are close to me,coz I know sometimes, “love is blind” …hahs. 

Have a listen of the song, should you haven’t already…

lyrics here